55 Ways to get Rid of your Blind Date

i was checking out ade's blog went i came across this.. its kinda ridiculous and quite embarrassing. but who knows? it might actually works!

Blind Date:

55 Ways to get Rid of your Blind Date

1. At dinner, guard your plate with fork and steak knife, so as to give the impression that you'll stab anyone, including the waiter, who reaches for it. (lol.. this is tryable, unless the waiter is totaly cute, which is of course, a totally different matter..)

2. Collect the salt shakers from all of the tables in the restaurant, and balance them in a tower on your table. (um.. how about i ask my date to collect it for me, and then stack it up in a tower?)

3. Wipe your nose on your date's sleeve. Twice. (ewww? who knows where he's been earlier... totally unhygienic!)

4. Make funny faces at other patrons, then sneer at their reactions. (it's not nice to annoy other innocent ppl..)

5. Repeat every third third word you say say. (this might be fun =D!)

6. Give your claim to fame as being voted "Most Festerous" for your high school yearbook. (no comments)

7. Read a newspaper or book during the meal. Ignore your date. (rude, but it might just work.. unless he's doing the same thing of course..)

8. Stare at your date's neck, and grind your teeth audibly. (not a good idea.. what if he's some sort of perv??!)

9. Twitch spastically. If asked about it, pretend you don't know what they are talking about. (haha.. i'm not a good actress, but maybe u can pull it off xP)

10. Stand up every five minutes, circle your table with your arms outstretched, and make airplane sounds. (wheeeeee.........)

11. Order a bucket of lard. (order only right? it doesn't mean i have to *ugh* eat it rite??)

12. Ask for crayons to color the placemat. This works very well in fancier venues that use linen tablecloths. (omg.. i did this before *blush*... in KFC... and Pizza Hut...)

13. Howl and whistle at womens' legs, especially if you are female. (i prefer to admire my own xP)

14. Recite your dating history. Improvise. Include pets. (rite... like they'll believe..)

15. Pull out a harmonica and play blues songs when your date begins talking about themselves. (can i bring a cd player instead? i can't play the harmonica...)

16. Sacrifice french fries to the great deity, Pomme. (heee~~ i wanna try this! =D)

17. When ordering, inquire whether the restaurant has any live food. (err.. what if they really do? i mean.. for example, a seafood restaurant?)

18. Without asking, eat off your date's plate. Eat more from their plate than they do. (lol.. some ppl might not mind.. they'll just call u chubby -.-" right jun?)

19. Drool. (lol.. what if it turns romantic? *shudders* use ur imagination ppl..)

20. Chew with your mouth open, talk with your mouth full and spray crumbs. (hmmm.. this is so not me.. but it might work.. in the case of guys, spit saliva instead.. should be enough to disgust the girl =P)

21. Eat everything on your plate within 30 seconds of it being placed in front of you. (um... dangerous.. plus you'll probably get indigestion)

22. Excuse yourself to use the restroom. Go back to the head waiter/hostess and ask for another table in a different part of the restaurant. Order another meal. When your date finally finds you, ask him/her "What in the hell took you so long in the restroom?!?" (it'll work.. if you don't mind making a scene...)

23. Recite graphic limericks to the people at the table next to you. (if they know you, why not? =D)

24. Ask the people at the neighboring table for food from their plates. (errr.... dumb thing to do.. especially since malaysians really treasure their food)

25. Beg your date to tattoo your name on their derriere. Keep bringing the subject up. (lol... i don't know.. u try it and tell me if it works..)

26. Ask your date how much money they have with them. (its a very common question.. at least for me xP)

27. Order for your date. Order something nasty. (hehe.. try squid ink.. )

28. Communicate in mime the entire evening. (yeah.. mime puking.. )

29. Upon entering the restaurant, ask for a seat away from the windows, where you have a you have a good view of all exits, and where you can keep your back to the wall. Act nervous. (lol.. might work for a guy but not for a girl. cz the the guy might decide to act macho.. and decide to 'protect' you)

30. Lick your plate. Offer to lick theirs. (erm, riiittteee.......)

31. Hum. Loudly. In monotone. (err.. i did that before a few times.. haha.. on accident.. whats wrong with doing this anyway?!)

32. Fill your pockets with sugar packets, as well as salt and pepper shakers, silverware, floral arrangements... i.e anything on the table that isn't bolted down. (right. and get accused of shoplifting.. right.. do it at your own risk!)

33. Hold a debate. Take both sides. (oh..i do this all the time too! and yes, i can talk to myself... )

34. Undress your date verbally. Use a bullhorn. (do practise this skill before applying it.. it might turn your date on, which kinda isn't the point right?)

35. Auction your date off for silverware. (lol.. this might turn interesting..)

36. Slide under the table. Take your plate with you. (no comments)

37. Order a baked potato for a side dish. When the waiter brings your food, hide the potato, wait a few minutes, and ask the waiter for the potato you "never got". When the waiter returns with another potato for you, have the first one back up on the plate. Repeat later in the meal. (be careful, the waiter might spit in your drink!)

38. Order beef tongue. Make lewd comparisons or comments. (...)

39. Get your date drunk. Talk about their philosophy. Get it on tape, and use good judgement in editing to twist their words around. (if he/she's drunk, send him/her home and run! are you planning to see them again?!)

40. Discuss boils and lesions, as if from personal experience. (no comments.. go ahead if you know about the topic)

41. Speak in pig latin throughout the meal (Or ubber-dubber language, or just nonsense). (this might work if you're creative enough.. its not as easy as it sounds)

42. Take a break, and go into the restroom. When you return to the table, throw a spare pair of underwear on the back of one of the chairs. Insist that they just need airing out. (gosh... *i'm speechless*)

43. If they are paying, order the most expensive thing on the menu. Take one bite. (i hate wasting food and if they're smart, they finish it for me =P but guys, becareful.. you hv a higher risk of this happening)

44. Bring 20 or so candles you, and during the meal get up and arrange them around the table in a circle. Chant. (too troublesome.. unless they're those small pink candles u use for birthday cakes..)

45. Save the bones from your meal, and explain that you're taking them home to your invalid, senile old mother, because it's a lot cheaper than actually feeding her. (no comments)

46. Order your food by colors and textures. Sculpt. (messy, but it might be fun! you try it and tell me k? =D)

47. Take a thermos along, and hide it under the table. Order coffee, and fill the thermos one cup at a time, taking advantage of the free refills. (erm.. )

48. Insist that the waiter cuts your food into little pieces. In a simliar vein, insist that he take a bite of everything on the plate, to make sure no one poisoned it. (might take some time.. make sure you aren't hungry before trying this)

49. Accuse your date of espionage. (i did before xP of course i wasn't serious la.. )

50. Make odd allusions to dangerous religious cults. (do this at your own risk.. hopefully there are no government officials around. this is a serious issue nowadays)

51. Don't use any verbs during the entire meal. (too difficult - unless you don't speak english/ has no idea what a verb is)

52. Pass the hat in the restaurant. Use the proceeds (if any) to pay the bill. (knowing malaysians, someone will probably take the hat)

53. Break wind loudly. Add color commentary. Bow. (oh.. lol.. nothing to say abt this..)

54. Feed imaginary friends, or toy dolls you've brought along. (haha.. tryable)

55. Bring a bucket along. Explain that you frequently get ill. (its a blind date.. what if he's actually cute and sweet??!)

the Queen's victory =D

it's annoying when people think you're stupid. okay, so maybe you wouldn't know EVERYTHING, but you've thought that they'll at least give you more credit, especially since i'm no neanderthal! ish.. this is why i rarely share these news with you guys.. honestly... u all seem to enjoy leaping to conclusions. its damn annoying la wei!

another followup on the copycat. though we've been predicting it, its still unbelievable that she's still the same. she doesn't even feel guilty! maybe all that practise in the previous years finally paid off. arrgghh! i don't know.. does she even consider us as her friends? does she even think about how we felt? (yeah.. like strangling her.. -.-) i can feel our relationship stretching further and further away. and i don't think it'll last, for at some point, i will surely break if no action is taken to repair it. i have a feeling that ours is one which will lose touch, and one rather obvious reason is that she's going to Melb and she isn't exactly the type to make any effort in keeping in touch woth her old friends.. and i wouldn't know where her loyalties lie after that.. will she even remember us?

woke up damn early today. went to taylors to sell of my maths textbook and calculator. i guess i'm going again on monday.. still have to help the Queen sell her IT textbook.. oh, and speaking of the queen,

CONGRATZ RENEE!!!

*awww* u finally got to study what you wanted!

i'm so happy for you... :)

study harder this year k? and be the top lawyer next time..

hehe, then boleh bagi diskaun when i nid help rite =)

abt noon went to look for jeremy a while. kononnya wan show me his skill at foos. not bad my dear =) i'm impressed =P dude, if you ever read this, you need to chill k.. no need so kan chiong wan.. haha.. you aren't that bad at it. but really, u need to calm down. *sigh* boys...

came home about 4 something. got ready. Damian came at EXACTLY 6pm. haha.. great timing dude! he even bought a lily for me.. *awww* sweet rite? lol, went to Pyramid, walked around a little.. then dumb dumb jun n kming... i think stalking me.. ish.. suddenly appear and act surprised.. damned fake wei! ==' thx a lot la.. had Tomy Roma's for dinner. then watched National Treasure 2. yes, i know i've watched it, but he'd already watched the rest.. and besides, AVP isn't exactly my kind of show.. besides, i don't mind watching it agn =) sent me home at abt 11 something. haha.. i think my mum saw.. but she never say anything, so i just kept quiet.. it was a little difficult to hide the flower.. lucky i bought something and its in a big bag =D.. he's going back Aussie next week.. so not gonna see him anymore anytime soon - well, only on msn :)

yeap.. i still dulan some ppl. dunno when only will get over it. i hope it doesn't take too long.. i'm really afraid that i'll say or do something that i'll regret.

- currently savoring a snickers bar, celebrating the Queen's victory -

i *heart* you :)

okie.. gtg sleep early tnite. going to kdu to register tmr morning. *sigh*

~nitez ppl~

Once again, It's a new Beginning

Its funny how time flies. Before you know it, it’s already a new year and a new beginning. Granted, that it does not mean that you should forget the past, but then again, we should look forward with a positive outlook. There is no point regretting the past, and the only thing we can do is learn from it. That said, it isn’t as easy as it seems. It is harder to let go of the security and comfort of familiarity to face the unknown. We are all heading our separate ways, pursuing our dreams and future. Some leave with a smile and excitement whereas some leave tearfully, fearing what the future might hold.
Before long, we start leaving our past behind, learning to adapt to the new environment. How many of us will still keep in touch? How many will dive forward into success, forgetting past acquaintances? Oh yes, you might deny it and say to yourself ‘oh no, I would never do that!’ but are you sure? Like the e-mail Zkit sent me:-

How Friendships Break…
Both friends will think the other is busy and will not contact thinking it may be disturbing
As time passes, both will think “let the other contact”
After that, each will think, “why should I contact first?”
Here, love will be converted to hate
Finally, without contact, the memory becomes weak
They forget each other…

Will we be one of those who end up like that? Those in Aussie, I really miss you guys. And my dear friends, though we may no longer be together often, do stay in touch… forgive me if I bug you, and do return the favor by bugging me :) you’ll always be welcome… (btw, this does NOT mean I want a stalker!)

- reminiscing the past, wondering what the future holds –
- will it ever be the same again? –
- how much will we change? –
- live life to the fullest –
- look forward, no regrets –

*sigh* I love me >.<



Ps. update on birthday, sleepover, Christmas and New Year coming soon…

Pps. Happy New Year everyone!!

sry sry =D

sry for lack of recent updates

hee.. holiday season, author having holiday ma..

must forgive her rite? =D

forgive me la..

i'll update soon

I PROMISE!!!

=D

the B word - again

once again i get this awesome feeling of betrayal.. yeah.. thx a lot!

i guess i finally know where i stand in priorities of your life.

just another wasted year... big disappointment...

thanks, for not understanding, or not bothering to try
thanks, for finally showing your true colors
thanks, for showing how much i'm valued in your life

thanks, for getting me a lecture from my dad
thanks, for remembering me
thanks, for all your time, no matter how little

finally,
thanks for making my miserable results seem like an early christmas

~i just wanna curl up and cry~

~ is this what it means to trust?~

~ u wreck my heart~

~ and yet, i can't blame you~

~ because i'm just unimportant~

~and it never matters how i feel~

~ now i finally know~

i feel isolated and alone.

of masks and betrayal. story of my life. great.

superficial people. fake people living in a fake world.

ps.thanks shaun, for your time and care. you are indeed, a good friend =)

i miss my com...

borrowed jun's laptop agn.. checked my mail.. had 136mail thx to all the notification by friendster and facebook.. and of course a few actual mails.. took almost an hour to clear my inbox thx to the slow connection. haihz.. and i have yet to clear my facebook... dad called to check. apparently another 2 or 3 days is needed before it'll be returned to me..

for some inexplainable reason, i find myself feeling terribly insecure. not so much in others but more in myself..

"so many times i was alone and couldn't sleep
you left me drowning in my tears of memory

and ever since you've gone and found it hard to breathe
cause there was so much that your heart just couldn't see

a thousand ways to dreams
rolling of my eyes
the times been healing me
and i say goodbye..

cz i can breathe again, dream again
i'll be on the road again
like it used to be the other day
now feel free again, so innocent
cause someone makes me hold again

for sure
i'll find another you"

- cascada -

i don't know what i think sometimes, especially in the dead of the night when i should by all means be asleep. sometimes i feel like laughung. sometimes i just wanna cry. and sometimes, i just plain confused. i've tried to analyse my behaviour. as far as i know of, the cause of my unstability is unknown. okay, which of you jerks or bitches out there made me this way?! its not so much the rolling uncontrabble tidal wave of emotions that grip me at the most unfortunate times, but the apparent lack of causes of triggers. honestly, have i gone mental in captivity?? maybe i've finally collapsed under all that stress (what stress?!!) i've endured..

hmm.. results coming out soon. tmr in fact. i don't know what to think. i'm scared. terribly. wanted to call someone. but i didn't see the point seeing as they'll just be freaking me out by being freaked out. ah well.. the thing is, i am quite sure (after the initial dissappointment) that i can deal with it. i've really tried my best at that time. and i'm frankly, happy i haven't commited suicide (or thought of it) during the entire course. yay me! but can my dear straight-A's-always-top-in-class parents deal with it? i've always felt that i've been a slight dissappointment to them. i mean, recently, academically i've started failing and its not like i can actually do anything else. i absolutely abhor housework and prefer instead lazing around or out spending money. am i a failure? -i don't know what to think-

lalala~~

whatever that comes, i'll take it in stride*

(*does not include external variables)

PC / PD

stupid stupid virus!!!

make me have to send for repair. will take 'a few days' according to the guy.. i bet it takes at least a week.. damned if it takes 2 weeks -.- . well, i can't do anything about it. just hope it comes back to me soon..

WAAAAAA~~~

what am i gonna do at home now??!

no more facebook-ing, no more friendster-ing, no more blogging...

*omg* no more chatting!! die!!!

my hp bill sure increase d... and i'm broke =(

jun told me to meet him at cindy's hse on sunday

normally, i'd decline, seeing its that time of the year again..

but then you know what??!!

*gasp* that donkey threatened me!

(and i'm not gonna tell u with what)

that was the lowest, evil-est, meanest, underhanded thing to do!

and if he'd stoop that low to make me go...

i'm afraid to think what's in store for me..

me very scared =(

somebody save me!

oh, on the bright side, i've already gotten my bday pressie from sue ^^. i heart that girls loads!! i hope she's enjoying her time in Korea now... misses her lots... she got me this totally cute red mickey mouse pillow =D.. *awww* a really hadn't expected anything and i was really surprised when she gave it to me at the airport. haha.. everyone (kmeng, liying, edison, jeremy, kim, lisa, wing, sue, jon, steve) shouted 'happy 18th birthday' so loud that everyone, like seriously, EVERYONE was staring at me - even the old man who was checking in at the counter! gosh, i didn't know to feel happy or embarressed. haha.. ask anyone there, and they'll tell you how red my face was..

oh yeah, i promised i'd post some pics didn't i?

here's a summary of my PD trip:

woke up at 7am on wednesday morning. got ready by 8am. delayed cause my cousin refused to bath ==" till 9.30am. btw, my cousin's only 4 yrs old. so anyway, had breakfast at some restaurant near my aunt's house at kota damansara. i didn't eat much cz i was still sleepy. regretted it at about 11am while on the road. thankfully, i had my chocolate bar - Snickers! yay me! smart of me to bring le...

with my sis, in the car

arrived in town, just in time for lunch. drove around a little, and despite telling my dad there's alomst nothing there to eat in the afternoon, he didn't believe me. so yeah, basically drove around, starving everyone till he finally gave in and took my suggestion: KFC

lunch

so after lunch, checked in at the Avillion Port Dickson. kinda nice actually... except for the fact that they have a teeny weenie cage they call the 'Orchid Garden' which even my house garden surpasses, and an under equipped and freaking isolated gym. hotel restaurants are also a little er.. wierd. cz they have this restaurant called the crow's nest which required formal dressing, tie and all tht... seriously, who actually brings formal wear to the beach??!!

random shots of the hotel and grounds

my room (127) - shared with my brother and cousin

the deck in the evening

so yeah, swam a little (at the hotel pool.. no way i'm entering the sea!), get darker by the day, ate a lot - mostly seafood, basically slacked a lot... so 3 days passed, went home, slept.

THE END

hehe.. potong rite?

lol.. and thats my family vacation of the year...

so yeah, due to the factor mentioned above, i may not be online, facebook-ing, friendste-ing or blogging for a short (hopefully) period of time. my apologies. however, u'r always free to call.

if you have my number of course =p

okay, gotta return the laptop now. buy for now. will miss you sorely my dear internet (despite the lousy connection) *sobs*

yeah, so what if i'm melodramatic?

it adds spice to the world doesnt it?

you don't have to say it, but i know you love me anyway

*awww*

(ss-ing: do not disturb)

lol

i crack myself up sometimes...

i *heart* me

If you think your first date was embarrassing...

If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope you're sitting down when you read it. This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!!We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake. Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter... Snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside SaltLakeCity, Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.

They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.

Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It wasquickly apparent that she had a brand new problem. Due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about"what is taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off" and in need of some assistance! He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too,got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.

Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.

As the audience screamed in laughter, she took theTonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be "pants down. "And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment..."This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off."

Oh, and how did the first date turn out?

He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.

If you laughed... pass it on!

*thanks for the e-mail ven =D