Hurdles

Okay. I suppose its about time I lay off the emo posts - at least for the time being.

So how has everyone been doing? Very sorry about the sudden retreat from certain events. And I'm sorry for missing Cal and Su Wen's b'day party. It was too difficult for me. Happy Belated Birthday anyways. If you're free, call me out and we'll get some ice-cream, on me =)

Before you launch into a full blown lecture about how I should take care of myself (as quite a few have done on MSN), let me just tell you this: CHILL.

I am NOT sick - at least no more than usual

I am NOT depressed - most of the time anyways

I am NOT gonna remain emo for the rest of my life

Thanks for the concern though. I can usually retain self control, enough to get through the day. Ignore the occasional cracks and im sorry if I made anyone feel uncomfortable. Besides, I'm supposed to be fine most of the time, not that it really matters since I look fine, but then again, if I can really look fine, I guess that means I really am fine? And seeing that this covers 'most of the times' why am I even discussing this? ugh.

So anyways, Brian called earlier cz he was bored - thats his official excuse, but its obviously more to check up on me. Being typical idiots, it went something like this:-

Brian: hello
Me: hey

Brian: How are you?
Me: Emo

Brian: Me too
Me: What for?

Brian: no reason
Me: wtf?

Brian: Yarh. Hear your voice then I suddenly emo. Miracle ler..
Me: wtf??

Brian: So.... wanna bet who's emo-ier?
Me: WTF???

Brian: I'm serious ler! I'm so emo now I could eat 3 packets of Doritos
Me: hmph. Eat la. I don't care. I'm the original emo-ier. Kenot copy.

Brian: Eh! Emo not you invent wan le. No copyright also
Me: I dun care (*sulks*)

Brian: Hah! I knew I was emo-ier than you
Me: wtf? where got??? you don't sound emo also. stop lying you liar! (sorry la. brain was not exactly working. can't think of more creative names to call him. *sigh*)

Brian: Me no lie. Me sitting down larh..
Me: ........

Brian: So.. how are you?
Me: I'm fine lah!

Brian: HAH! i knew you were lying! See! I told you I'm more emo
Me: wtf wtf wtf -____- I'm more emooooooo!

Brian: No larh. Dun lie. You are annoyed, not emo. You think I stupid arh?
Me: .........

We argued like that for almost 20 minutes. Geez. Now I feel like such a retard.

ps. Its amazing how much heartache you can get when someone dear disappoints. Being the one elder, I supposed its my fault. Again. But how much can one person really tolerate? And for how long? I feel apprehension and tension. Unwilling to forget, will this be the end?

pps. Seeds of doubt are sprouting. I'm in trouble.