a different me

listening to the pattering of the rain
i find myself thinking about how much i've changed
from one who used to be super shy - still am
to be who i am today

sometimes nowadays i find myself unsure of who i am and what i have become.
no longer do i feel content to be just me.
no longer can i honestly say "i love me, myself and i".
and i don't know why...

sometimes, just sometimes,
i feel like i'm all alone
despite having friends all around me
no offence to you guys, of course..
i just feel alone - and not in a good way

earlier, while i was chatting with a friend
he told me he felt like shutting himself up in a closet
never to come out
despite ridiculing him
i felt like i knew what he meant
this isn't good

this isn't good at all...

i've never been one to share whenever i need help
never, until i break down
and then i'm a pitiful sight
and i apologize to those ppl who knew
for burdening you with my insignificant little troubles

but then again, if you weren't there for me,
who are you to call yourself a friend?

this is a crappy little post from a crappy little blogger
(who's supposed to be studying)

right.

i'm supposed to be bored with blogger. been concentrating more on my xanga account. but really, i'm addicted. and u can't blame me. cz honestly, don't you think you'd rather blog than study? studying stuff which i cannot remember. staring at the tiny words across the textbook, trying to make sense of graphs and tables. i'm annoyed and grumpy. bah!

by the way, happy birthday li jean :) sorry i couldn't make it for your party. mum wouldn't let. say need study :( haihz.. another totally wasted weekend...